Valentine's is for Lovers = Bullroar

[sun_set_bravely]

My mom called me at work earlier this week to tell me that I should expect a small something from her to arrive soon. She said, "I'm not sure when your mom's supposed to stop giving you stuff for Valentine's..." I told her "Never", because it seems to me that the core of Valentine's Day is the celebration of love in all its forms, and I love my mom in the most unique way I can love anyone (we've shared the same body for nine months). But she also said, "I know that you and Chris" (my boyfriend) "are probably doing something for Valentine's, so I don't know where I fit in..."

This is ridiculous to me. Thus begins my Valentine's Day rant. I preface it by saying that I believe romantic and sexual love to be wonderful and important, but not exclusively so.

At rehearsal last night, my friends who aren't seeing anyone expressed great bitterness about Valentine's Day. One of them made fun of the plans my boyfriend and I have with another couple, saying that maybe if she was with someone, she'd be invited to the dinner too. When I asked her and several other friends to join us, it comes out that she's actually got excellent plans with her two roommates to go out and get fabulously stoned. Why does a dinner between two couples get the Valentine's Stamp of Approval where a dinner with three great friends and roommates get the Anti-Valentine's Stamp of Approval?

I hate that this holiday is prejudiced to romantic love. Granted, that's where its roots are, but I'm tired of romantic love being the Most Important Love a person can/should experience in a lifetime. What about friendship love? Or the love for one's child? Or sibling love? Or the deep love and respect for a colleague or collaborator?

I hate that two of my closest friends don't want to be around me on this day because I have a boyfriend.

I hate that someone last night semi-jokingly wished all the couples "horrible, terrible sex" on Valentine's Day.

I hate that my roommate (of whom I am very fond) doesn't feel welcome at a meal with my boyfriend and two of my good friends who happen to be a couple.

I hate that most people would move across the country with or to be with their boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse but very few would move across the country with or to be with their best friend.

I think that this is changing, that forms of love other than romance are again beginning to be valued and important. At one time in history, when a woman's best girl-friend came to visit her and her husband's home, it was assumed that the husband would vacate the marital bed to give the two friends privacy to talk all night and express their great love for each other.

Maybe it would be nice to be a priest or nun for a year or two, just to experience the freedom from society's expectations that you'll find a romantic love. To explore the enormous range of loves that a person can feel in this life.

Why limit ourselves to only one?

Comments

Shut up you . . . couple person!

[bobbydrake007.livejournal.com]

No, seriously, you make a good point. However, for whatever reason, romantic love is the most profitable. People have found ways to attach monetary value to how much someone loves someone else and somehow, it isn't regarded as dysfunctional. in fact, it plays on our primal instincts. I saw an add for a diamond necklace that said "isn't it nice to know that after all these years, you can still make her heart skip a beat." I don't want to have to buy a girl something to make her heart skip a beat, but the truth is that our society encourages materialism and purchasing power is sexy. Sad but true.

Yet again, Earnest finds a way to blame the ills of the world on capitalism. Menawhile, the turntables he spent $800 on in an ebay auciton are taking their sweet time through the US mail to get to him.